Secret to Serentity book cover

Childhood sexual abuse robs the innocence of the child and left unspoken, wraps it‘s tentacles around the heart and soul forever. Secret to Serenity is a story of friendship, secrets, and true transformation from a hidden life of lies to authenticity and spiritual healing. Order now. $12.95.

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CHRYSTY‘S BIO

CHRYSTY STURDIVANT enjoys public speaking, teaching and mentoring others who have experienced childhood sexual abuse. Her love for Jesus began when her grandmother rocked her in the church nursery and sang lullabies filled with stories of a loving Jesus.

Chrysty graduated from University of Texas Medical Branch with a degree in occupational therapy. She has devoted her professional career in taking care of infants and young children and now practices as a neonatal therapist in Dallas Texas. In 2009, she and Sandra Carroll began their own consulting and education business and today she teaches and mentors other therapists seeking to become neonatal therapists. Chrysty has traveled to Africa and actively serves on a non-profit organization called CLASP (Connective Link Among Special needs Programs) International. CLASP allows professionals to go into countries where developmental and rehabilitative care for individuals with special needs is not practiced and provides training to the natives of that country. She is a sought after speaker at a local, regional and national level.

God brought Ray Sturdivant into her life and they were married in 2004. They teach and lead a home Bible study, travel together on revival and mission trips and seek God‘s purpose in their life on a daily basis. In 2011 Ray and Chrysty founded Mining the Truth, a ministry dedicated to helping people who are looking for a more in-depth and authentic walk with Jesus that results in freedom and abundant life. Ray broadcasts daily radio devotions in the New Mexico area. Ray‘s daily devotions are available by podcast and can be found on the website miningthetruth.com. They are both volunteers for a revival ministry called Time to Revive and travel to cities in the USA, spreading and sharing God‘s love and the gospel.

Chrysty attends Dallas Bible Church in Richardson, Texas where her husband is currently an elder. She enjoys speaking at workshops and conferences for women and enjoys her role as a wife of an elder.

Chrysty and Ray reside in Dallas, Texas where they enjoy traveling, family gatherings and being grandparents to Blain, Faith and Adyson. They have three German shorthaired pointers named Taz, Milk and Wig. They especially love talking about Jesus and faithfully walking in His light.


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DR NINA‘S BIO

Dr. Nina Rios-Doria is a Licensed Professional Counselor, speaker, writer, and parenting educator. She is passionate about helping children and youth feel encouraged, loved, and accepted, and most importantly protected.

She has counseled many at-risk children and teens dealing with a variety of issues such as; anxiety, anger, depression, eating disorders, and abuse. She has done group counseling with teens struggling with drugs and alcohol, unhealthy relationships, and sexual abuse. Dr. Nina has also worked with parents of children who have been sexually abused.

She is enthusiastic about empowering young women to excel in life and avoid unhealthy dating relationships and abuse. This has led her to educate young women concerning healthy dating relationships at organizations such as; Boys and Girls Club, Girls Inc., Girl Scouts, Dallas Can Academy, HIKIDS (Helping Inner City Kids in Danger), churches, schools, and other organizations.

Dr. Nina hopes to continue to empower and protect our young children and youth by educating the public about sexual abuse. She is a facilitator for Darkness to Light, an organization that focuses on the prevention of sexual abuse. She leads an interactive sexual abuse prevention training program, called Stewards of Children, that helps adults understand what sexual abuse is, and recognize the signs of abuse and how to protect and talk to our children.

She received her Masters degree in Counseling from Dallas Baptist University and holds a PhD in Child Development from Texas Woman‘s University. Dr. Nina wrote her dissertation on, “The Influence of Abuse, Family Dysfunction, and Isolation on Institutionalized Male Young Adults Psychopathology.” After writing her paper and meeting young males from Texas Youth Commission she decided to become a big sister to a little boy from Big Brothers Big Sisters of North Texas.

Dr. Nina has produced and hosted radio shows and local cable TV shows that were inspirational and educational and focused on improving overall mental health. She had a weekly segment on TXA 21, a part of CBS Television Stations, entitled, “Raising Children Right.” Dr. Nina has plans to launch her own parenting show in the near future.

She continues to educate parents in the Dallas Fort Worth area through her writing, and writes articles for local magazines and newspapers on numerous parenting topics.

She is married to an anesthesiologist, and they have a daughter and three Pomeranians. Her entire family lives in Dallas so she enjoys many family gatherings throughout the year. In her free time, she enjoys playing the guitar, and competing in triathlons with her husband. Dr. Nina attends White‘s Chapel Methodist Church in Southlake, TX and volunteers for women‘s events as well as contributing articles for the church newspaper.

To learn more about Dr. Nina and other things she‘s involved with, visit her website www.dr-nina.com


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Dr. Nina photo

ENDORSEMENTS

This is a book of questions and answers; lies and truth, cover-up and revelation, seduction and surrender, hopelessness and hope, pain and healing, shock and composure, discouragement and encouragement. Perhaps “Secret to Serenity” tells your story. It certainly reveals how you can receive healing from abuse. This is a must read for you or someone you care about.
Thelma Wells, D.D., Author and Speaker
President - A Woman of God Ministries

As the owner and editor of a Christian publication, I‘m privileged to review hundreds of amazing books and resources by some of our country‘s greatest speakers and teachers. I‘m blessed, yet again, by a life-changing work in “Secret to Serenity”!
“Secret to Serenity” is a must-read for any sexual abuse survivor and those who love them. The book offers keys to serenity after sexual abuse and is designed to walk readers through a very real and transformational experience. Written in a warm, safe and encouraging format, the authors have created a personal connection to readers. Issues are addressed compassionately via dialog between Dr. Nina and her co-author Chrysty. Readers are provided a front-row seat to the life-changing counseling that has taken place and feel as though they are in the room with the authors. Each chapter offers story background, Q&A, Dr. Nina‘s notes, Biblical Truths that soothe the soul, a Prayer, and activities which stimulate the reader‘s own healing journey.
“Secret to Serenity” is both very realistic and comforting, expressing the
authentic, deep thoughts and feelings of survivors while written in an easy-to- read, conversational style. “Secret to Serenity” replaces lies with truth and glorifies the one and only true healer, our Father God.
Jennifer McBride
Editor - Dallas Family Magazine

As a neighbor and friend of Dr. Nina‘s, we continually observe her deep concern for those who have been hurt by sexual abuse and suffer deep emotional and psychological damage. As a licensed professional counselor, she clearly understands the necessity of spiritual healing concerning situations that can devastate one‘s mind and sense of well-being.
Tragically, sexual abuse has become a chronic problem in America. No need to waste time discussing the contributing factors. The issue is, someone has been abused, damaged and hurt deeply. There are answers-very realistic and meaningful answers.
Dr. Nina and Chrysty are committed to helping others find the pathway to healing. Complete recovery is a process, and help is offered in this book. “Secret to Serenity” provides the inspiration and direction necessary to begin the journey with hope and assurance. We recommend this book because it is written by two women who truly care and can offer life-changing help.
James and Betty Robison
Founders, LIFE Outreach Inter national
Co-Hosts, LIFE Today Television

“Secret to Serenity” is the incredibly emotional and spiritual story of a woman‘s journey as a sexual abuse survivor. Chrysty‘s comprehensive account of the life long issues that face abused children is shocking and thought provoking. I feel blessed to have had the chance to read Chrysty‘s story. She has sought God in prayer to help in her healing. Chrysty and Dr. Nina are also taking the opportunity to change the lives of others affected by sexual abuse.
T. Charles Pierson
President & CEO
Big Brothers Big Sisters of America

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SPEAKING & EVENTS

If you are interested in scheduling Chrysty and/or Dr. Nina to speak at your upcoming event, retreat, church or business, email your requests to .


Interviews/Media



For media requests, please contact Dr. Nina at



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Stories Shared

STORIES SHARED

Transformation and healing begins when you speak the truth and walk out of the darkness and towards the light. This means telling your story, your truth and begin the healing process. We want to hear about you!

Please email us your story and we will consider posting here so that you may feel a sense of connection. You are not alone. Many have experienced abuse. Remember one in four women and one in six men have experienced sexual abuse.

STACY‘S STORY

Age 33

I was 4 years old, pretty blonde long hair wearing my pretty white dress. We were visiting our family; I remember it like it was yesterday. It was Christmas time and we went to my Nana's house (my great Grandmother) to celebrate with all of the family, probably 20 of us or so. Like I said it's like this was yesterday, I was sitting on my great Grandfathers' lap in the living room with all the family around talking and laughing. My dad was sitting at the window seat in the kitchen talking and laughing with his brothers. As I was looking around seeing all this being the good little girl I was all of a sudden I was scared wondering what was going on. I didn't understand it, why is his hand under my panties. I was scared and didn't know what to do so I sat there like nothing was happening, like this was supposed to happen I guess? I can remember looking at my dad and wondering why he wasn't doing something about this. Why was he still in the kitchen and not in here stopping this?

I didn't tell anyone. When I look back there was so many signs that something had happened to me. My parents always talk about when I was in 1st grade at a teacher conference my teacher said “Stacy is always angry”. My parent's reaction was “oh that's just the wrath of Stacy”. It was a joke, that's just Stacy. That is what I was told my entire life, that's just Stacy, that's how she is. I dated men when I was a child. Yes that is right men, not boys. Looking back I know God was watching over me from the time I was a little child till right this moment as I'm typing this. He has always been there even when I didn't know Him or care to know Him. I was in really bad relationships and it was my normal, chaos, that is what I liked; no that is what I was used to.

Like I said God was watching over me and I know now that He had a plan for me, a great plan for me. I met my husband when I was 22. We met and were married within 11 months of knowing each other. His family thought he was crazy. See we were in Colorado and his family was all in Texas so they didn't know me. I believe God sent him to Colorado to save me. We were married in 2001 and by 2003 we had our son and were living back in Texas with all of his family. They were all still unsure of me, but they all had opened arms even with the thickest wall up between me and anyone to come in front of me. Now at this time I didn't believe in Jesus or God for that matter. Casey, my husband was the one to start opening my eyes to Him. It was a slow process but I saw Him, I felt Him, I knew that there was a God and that Jesus had come to this world to save me from my sins!

A few years later when I was about 25 I finally let my secret out of the bag about my great Grandfather. I told my mother in law, whom was also sexually abused when she was a very young child. She helped me through this process and walk by my side and prayed with me. I started seeing a Christian counselor with my Casey around this time, we were having issues and he almost left me. By the grace of God he stuck by my side and he has been a very patient loving husband as I have gone on this journey. After about a year I was seeing my own counselor without Casey. It was time for me to deal with my issues. I went to a counselor for 2-3 years on my own and had a lot of issues to deal with. One of the big ones was the anger I had that leads back to what had happened to me at the age of 4. I was ashamed, angry, sad, angry, scared, angry. See there was a lot of anger to deal with and it was pointed at a lot of different people. My parents, my Grand parents, my great Grand parents. Why didn't they stop it, why didn't they do something about it? They didn't know it had happened to me but it sure felt like they should have known. I remember when I was visiting my mother and I told her what had happened to me when I was 4. I look back now and I think why did I say it like that to her, it's the only way I knew how to say it. I said, “I think if we lived in California when I was growing up I would have been molested... by Rudy” (my great Grandfather). She looked at me funny and kind of laughed and said “oh I don't think that would happen”. My response was” mom it happened when I was 4 years old and everyone was in the room when it happened”. The hardest thing was getting it out to my mother. I guess I thought she wouldn't believe me or she would look at me differently. It was almost easy to tell my mother in law; she had horrible things happen to her at a young age. She went to counseling and she knows what I'm feeling. Years later after I told my mother about this I found out that she was abused when she was younger also. Man how I wish I would have known this earlier, I think I would have had the courage to tell her.

God has put so many people in my life to help me through this process and I am so thankful for that. I have come to forgive so many. I had anger towards all these people that had nothing to do with it, that hadn't done anything to me. I had to let go of that anger to be able to grow, and love others the way Christ loves me. I am still working on forgiving Rudy, I'm not there yet but I know I'm close. God wants us to forgive for ourselves. Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting, it means I am not going to let this hold me back and it is not ok what you did to me. All it does is hold us back, it doesn't hurt anyone else except us. Rudy has been dead for 19 years and just because he is dead doesn't mean that the feelings are gone. It is still a process for me to go through. I just recently forgave my great Grandmother for staying with a monster. This forgiveness came after she passed away this last year. I don't feel that hate towards her like I had. God has given me that gift. I am still waiting on the gift of forgiving Rudy, but I know in time that too will happen. It's all in timing with God; it's His time, not ours. He is in control and we have to learn to let go and let Him lead us and we will be free of all our guilt, shame, anger, and anything else that we hold onto.

This is all in His Glorious Name!
Stacy Graves


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